Archive | April, 2008

Souvenir swords get two expelled

29 Apr

Those dangerous choir students! What were they thinking buying Father’s Day presents in England? But these days, who knows which students will snap? A few years back I saw a High School Freshman’s student handbook, and it was 60+ pages long. It dictated hair length, style and color and even vague forbiddings of “unusual or disruptive” hair. Having had disruptive hair in High School I have empathy for school kids today.

Pictured below is an array of LOTR replica swords, surely the offensive miniature would be one of these.

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Students ousted from Apple Valley, Eagan schools after spring choir trip
By Bao Ong | 04/24/2008 12:29:32 AM CDT | www.twincities.com

Two students attending Eagan and Apple Valley high schools were expelled last week after buying souvenir swords during a spring break choir trip in the United Kingdom.

A chaperone found the duct-taped boxes that held the swords after the students left the store. The swords were confiscated on the trip and never made it to Minnesota. The students flew home several days early, and the district disciplined the students when they returned.

“The severity of the punishment didn’t fit the crime here,” said Brad Briggs, 45, an Eagan resident and father of one of the expelled teens. “There was no intent of violence.”

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Poisonous Spiders Close Australian Hospital

26 Apr

Wow, like how bad does it have to be to close a hospital?

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Spider plague closes Australian hospital
Tuesday, April 22, 2008 | www.sfgate.com

A tiny Australian hospital is closing temporarily because of an infestation of poisonous spiders.

The Baralaba Multi Purpose Health Service will close for 24 hours starting Thursday morning so officials can fumigate the building to get rid of redback spiders that have been found in large numbers in the main part of the hospital.

Three or four patients will need to be moved to another hospital while the building is closed, according to a statement from Queensland state health officials.

Redback spiders, common throughout most of the country, have a painful bite and a toxic venom, although an anti-venom is available.

The statement said warm weather had caused more redback spider eggs to hatch than usual.

“We believe the best way to deal with them, and the safest option for staff and patients, is to have the whole building fumigated so both the spiders and their eggs are killed,” Ellen Palmer, rural director of nursing, said in the statement Wednesday.

Nearly 300 people live in Baralaba, about 320 kilometers (200 miles) northwest of Brisbane.

Lost Dog Found Flyer

25 Apr

It’s Friday. Be Silly. 

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Balloons Found-Floating Priest Missing

23 Apr

It’s not an easy or exact science to fly with balloons. American men seem to be the best at it, based on the flights of Kent Couch and lawn chair flight pioneer Larry Walters. Click those links for great posts in balloon chair avionics.

The most recent attempt to fly with balloons seems to be ending badly for the pilot, a priest from Brazil. The latest news says his balloons have been found but he has not.

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Brazilian priest on balloon voyage goes missing
Last Updated: Wednesday, April 23, 2008 | 7:16 AM ET | CBC News

A Brazilian priest who rode a bundle of party balloons into the horizon to set a flight record has disappeared.

Rev. Adelir Antonio di Carli took off Sunday from the coastal city of Paranagua in southern Brazil, buoyed by hundreds of helium-filled balloons.

Wearing a helmet, aluminum thermal flight suit, waterproof clothes and a parachute, he was attempting to break the 19-hour record of human flight by party balloons.

Eight hours after takeoff, di Carli was reported missing after he lost contact with authorities.

Rescuers said they have found the balloons floating in the ocean off the coast of southern Brazil but have seen no sign of di Carli, who planned to use money raised from his adventure to finance a “spiritual” rest stop for truckers in Paranagua, which is the country’s primary grain port.

“Given his physical condition and the equipment he was carrying, I would say there is an 80 per cent chance that he is still alive,” fire commander Johnny Coelho told Globo TV.

Coelho said the priest could be floating somewhere in the ocean or may have found refuge at a remote beach or coastal forest. He was carrying enough cereal bars and water to sustain him for five days and had a GPS device, satellite phone and buoyant chair with him, Coelho said.

It was di Carli’s second balloon journey following a successful four-hour voyage from the Brazilian town of Ampere to Argentina in January.

Soyuz’s Rough Re-Entry Blamed on 2 Women

22 Apr

How wonderful it is to be a human today. We can hurtle humans into the black void of space but when things go awry, superstitions abound. Since space travel is relatively new in human endeavors, I think old maritime superstitions are often reached for. How truly awesome that people can return from space in a gizmo not much larger than a commercial refrigerator.

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Capsule carrying first SKorean astronaut lands off target
By MIKE ECKEL | April 20, 2008 | AP

MOSCOW (AP) — A Russian capsule carrying South Korea’s first astronaut touched down 260 miles off target in northern Kazakhstan on Saturday after hurtling through the atmosphere in a bone-jarring descent from the international space station.

It was the second time in a row — and the third since 2003 — that the Soyuz landing went awry.

Mission Control spokesman Valery Lyndin said the condition of the crew — South Korean bioengineer Yi So-yeon, American astronaut Peggy Whitson and Russian flight engineer Yuri Malenchenko — was satisfactory, though the three had been subjected to severe gravitational forces during the re-entry.

The Russian TMA-11 craft touched down at 4:51 a.m. EDT about 260 miles off its mark, Lyndin said, a highly unusual distance given how precisely engineers plan for such landings. It was also around 20 minutes later than scheduled. Search helicopters then took 25 minutes to locate the capsule and determine the crew was unharmed.

Officials said the craft followed a so-called “ballistic re-entry” — a very steep trajectory that subjects the crew to extreme physical force. Lyndin said the crew had experienced gravitational forces up to 10 times those on Earth during the 3 1/2 hour descent.

The crew were being examined on site by medical officials, and were later to return to Moscow for further evaluation.

“The most important thing is that the crew is healthy and well,” Federal Space Agency chief Anatoly Perminov told reporters. “The landing occurred normally, but according to a back-up plan — the descent was a ballistic trajectory.”

Perminov said engineers would examine the capsule to determine what caused the glitch, though he blamed the Soyuz crew for not informing Mission Control about the unusual descent.

Later, Perminov referred to a naval superstition that having women aboard a ship was bad luck when asked about the presence of two women on the Soyuz.

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Bulgarian Man Trades Wife for Goat

21 Apr

Usually one hears of this sort of thing in Africa or India, but as the astute reader will note, this Bulgarian didn’t MARRY the goat, merely traded his wife for her. I’m sure many people who’ve been thru the heart break of divorce wish they could have worked things out so easily…

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Stoil Panayotov, exchanged his third wife with Elena the 8-year-old goat at a livestock market in March
By VINCE SOODIN | Published: 11 Apr 2008 | www.thesun.co.uk

A LUCKLESS farmer who was been married three times has decided to try his hand at marriage one last time – with a goat.

Bulgarian Stoil Panayotov, exchanged his third wife with Elena the eight-year-old goat at a livestock market in March – because she couldn’t provide him with a child.

The extraordinary deal was concluded in front of a stunned crowd in the market town of Plovdiv, central Bulgaria.

“The day before a friend told me that he has had no luck with women and that he really liked my wife,” says the 54-year-old.

“The deal was reached when my wife gave her approval.”

Stoil was first married at just 18, two months before his national service.

However his luck soon started to wane after his mother fell out with his new bride and removed her form the family home.

After a very short second marriage, Stoil then married his third and final wife Maria with whom he stayed with for nine years.

Things however turned sour and after failing to provide him with a child, he decided enough was enough.

“The goat has given birth to three kids and my wife to none,” Stoil explains.

“So this deal was more profitable to the goat owner, I got a second- hand goat and he got a brand new wife.”

One can only imagine who or what Stoil will marry next if things don’t work out with Elena.

Boy Chipper After Butterknife Removed From Head

18 Apr

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“If you like get a butter knife in your head, don’t yank it out”
-Tyler Hemmert

Luckily the knife embedded in his head did not penetrate his skull. Tyler Hemmert not only survived his ordeal, but his sense of humor and good cheer remained intact. The still photos of Tyler and his injury are an incomplete picture of this remarkable, tough and good natured kid. Video links are often fussy, so I don’t know if the one I embedded will work. MissFidget.com loves stories about tough kids. Get well soon Tyler!

Click here for the video.

Boy gets butter knife stuck in head
Luckily, the butter knife that became lodged in his head did not pierce skull
By Bob Considine | TODAYShow.com contributor | updated 9:01 a.m. ET, Wed., April. 16, 2008

In the history of weaponry, the dull-edged butter knife hasn’t ranked high on the list of weapons of choice. But don’t tell that to Tyler Hemmert.

The 11-year-old Vancouver boy needed doctors to remove a butter knife from his head on Sunday. He says he and friend Nate Leach were sitting on a park bench when another boy became angry with them and hurled the knife.

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Drunk Russian Doesn’t Notice 6inch Knife in Back

18 Apr

“Things happen when you drink.” Well said.

Drunk Russian sleeps off stabbing
www.telegraph.co.uk  |  By Natalie Paris  |  Last Updated: 11:59am BST 18/04/2008

A Russian man was struggling to remember a night of heavy drinking after waking to find a knife in his back.

Vodka drinker Yuri Lyalin, 53, was woken by his wife the next morning with not only a hangover but a six-inch blade between his shoulders.

Mr Lyalin managed to take a bus home, eat his breakfast and then fall into a deep sleep without realising he had been stabbed by his drinking partner.
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It wasn’t until his wife spotted the protruding handle and woke him, that an ambulance was called and he was taken to casualty.

Mr Lyalin, an electrician, had reportedly been drinking with a watchman at a factory in Vologda where he works.

It appears that the pair had an argument at some point before Mr Lyalin passed out.

The next morning when Mr Lyalin tried to resume his duties he was sent home for being inebriated.

None of his co-workers noticed the knife.

He then took a meandering course home, stopping to eat some sausage from his fridge before sleeping it off, according to Russian newspapers Komsomolskaya Pravda and Gazeta.

His doctor, Victor Belov, said the knife “went into soft tissue and by pure luck did not touch any vital organs,” Komsomolskaya Pravda reported.

Mr Lyalin himself was philosophical about the incident.

“We got drunk together,” he said. “Things happen when you drink.”

Spitting Vicar Shitc@nned

17 Apr

The headline given this story by the BBC makes one wonder if the Bishop got cozy in the sack with the vicar or fired him. This BBC show about this guy is “The Vicar of Dribbley.” Ha ha ha. Holy Man indeed.

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‘Spitting vicar’ sacked by bishop

news.bbc.co.uk | 10 April 2008

A Church of England vicar accused of spitting at and intimidating his parishioners has been ordered to leave his Cambridgeshire post by his bishop.

Rev Dr Tom Ambrose, 61, of St Mary and St Michael Church in Trumpington, has been disqualified from carrying out any of the functions of his office.

A church tribunal last year recommended the move citing “pastoral breakdown”.

I do not spit and I never swear. If there is any person who has ever see me do such a thing, let them come forward
-Rev Dr Tom Ambrose

Dr Ambrose has issued a denial he ever spat at parishioners and said the allegation was never put to him.

Dr Ambrose had clashed with parishioners over his plans to modernise the church.

The tribunal heard evidence of “arrogant, aggressive, rude, bullying, high-handed, disorganised and at times petty behaviour of Dr Ambrose”.

In the decision letter to the vicar and those who brought the tribunal, the Bishop of Ely Dr Anthony Russell wrote: “I am astonished and dismayed that there are recorded two occasions on which it is said that Dr Ambrose spat at parishioners, allegations which were not challenged in cross-examination.”

The incidents were part of a long line of disagreements between Dr Ambrose and worshippers at the church, the tribunal was told.

The tribunal heard allegations that he inundated opponents of his plans with e-mails and letters.

Dr Ambrose also allegedly upset older parishioners by using slide shows instead of sermons and using so much incense in church that some worshippers felt sick.

But he denied being aggressively confrontational and claimed that “envy” had been behind the allegations against him.

In a widely circulated email he said: “I wish to issue a categorical denial that I have ever spat at anyone in my entire life. This allegation has never been made to me personally.

“It was never made when PCC members first presented a case to the bishop several years ago, it was never made during… attempts at mediation.

“It was never raised at the mediation sessions which were held under the auspices of ACAS.”

“I do not spit and I never swear. If there is any person who has ever see me do such a thing, let them come forward.”

A Diocesan spokesman said Dr Ambrose remained a priest.

He said: “He has not lost his orders, essentially he’s lost his job.”

Dr Ambrose is understood to want to now take his case to an employment tribunal.

Frozen Baby Mammoth Found In Great Condition

15 Apr

This frozen baby mammoth is the best preserved specimen ever found and docs have been able to view her intact internal organs. How dog gone cool is this story? ((hardy har)) I expect in, oh, about 3 years we’ll see a tv special on public tv about this sweet lil baby mammothsicle.

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Can prehistoric mammoths now be cloned?

http://www.russiatoday.ru | April 11, 2008, 15:55

Russian scientists say they’ve managed to develop the most detailed picture ever of the insides of prehistoric animals. They made the discovery after studying a baby mammoth found immaculately preserved in the Yamalo-Nenets region in the Urals last year.

The scientists say it was crucial for the study of prehistoric life to pinpoint the exact location of the animal’s internal organs.

Some experts hope that the perfect condition in which the body of the mammoth was found could allow extricate intact DNA from his cells, and, as a result, clone the animal in future.

The 37,000 year-old baby mammoth was named ‘Lyuba’ after the wife of a nomadic reindeer tribesman who found it.

With its trunk still intact, eyes in place and small tufts of fur still on its skin, Lyuba looks more like a museum fake than an eye-witness to the Ice Age, though its tail is missing.

The creature’s organs were also perfectly preserved, and its heart could be clearly seen with the help of computer scanning techniques.

One hundred and thirty centimetres long, 90 centimetres tall and weighing only 50 kilogrammes, the mammoth is almost exactly as it was when it died.

The animal was immediately buried in a watery area or a bog after its death. There was no decay in lack of oxygen. It was located there in a frozen state for several thousand years until it reappeared to the world after a part of the river’s bank slipped off.

To keep it from deteriorating, Lyuba was being stored at minus 10 degrees Celsius in an industrial freezer in the regional museum.

Mammoths, believed to be close relatives of the modern day elephant, roamed the earth from almost 5 million years B.C. to just a few thousand years B.C., when they disappeared.

Yanks Nabbed Smuggling Beetles Down Under

14 Apr

These dudes were serious beetle fans. I’m familiar with smuggling exotic birds, but I’d never heard of bug smuggling before.

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Australia Nabs Two for Smuggling Beetles
www.javno.com/en | April 10, 2008

Investigators said the beetles were believed to be native species which cannot be exported without a permit.

Two men from the United States have been arrested and charged with trying to smuggle about 1,300 native beetles out of Australia in empty yoghurt containers, customs officials said on Thursday.

The men, aged 62 and 63, were detained at Perth airport in Western Australia state after customs officers found up to 1,000 tiger beetles hidden in one of set of luggage, and more than 300 beetles in another case.

“The beetles were contained in glass vials concealed inside five empty yoghurt containers,” customs manager of investigations Richard Janeczko said in a statement.

Investigators said the beetles were believed to be native species which cannot be exported without a permit. Australian species are popular with wildlife smugglers due to their bright colours.

The two men, one from Florida and one from Massachusetts in the United States, could face a maximum fine of A$100,000 ($92,000), or 10 years in jail, if convicted.

Karl Lagerfeld to Be in Video Game

12 Apr

I guess the video game dudes were sitting around brainstorming on the next big game and were like, ‘Madden , we need a new Madden.’ And voila! They came up with Lagerfeld. I wonder if his character uses a folding fan like Karl does? Seriously, are they reaching out to the hitherto untapped gay, german, octogenarian, gazillionaire, gamer demographic?

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Karl Lagerfeld comes to Grand Theft Auto IV
www.shinyshiny.tv

From the vaults of ‘you couldn’t make this up’ comes the news that noted fashion photographer Nigel Barker designer Karl Lagerfeld, the creative director of Chanel, is going to appear as a character in the forthcoming Grand Theft Auto It’s due on the 29th April, fashion/crazy driving fans. And yes, I totally had to check with Ms Catwalk Queen to find out which fashion house he worked for…

Not only is he getting cartoonified, he’s also going to feature as one of the radio DJs who’s station you can listen to whilst playing the game.